Sarah And Me: At Home With Sarah I

What's day-to-day domestic life like with is a female bodybuilder? I doubt I am the only one here who has spent more time than I probably should have pondering that question. Nowadays, you almost don't have to imagine. There are millions of images of muscle women just hanging out in their domestic surroundings. The spread of digital photography and the ease with which images can be shared have seen to that. But less than ten years ago, these little peeks into the intimate surroundings of female bodybuilders were (as far as I recall) quite rare.

Maybe Sarah was a pioneer in this field, or maybe I was just paying so much attention to what she was doing that I missed the fact that others were doing it too, but either way, the result was that for me, Sarah became the fantasy FBB girlfriend simply because there was so much material to fuel that fantasy. And given any female muscle lover's propensity to idealise these magnificent women (you see, there I go again), it won't be a surprise to learn that my daydreams about being Sarah's man around the house tended very much towards imagining an ideal world, an ideal life...

I don't know what you've heard about contest dieting making bodybuilders (male and female) difficult to live with, but Sarah was never any problem. Quite the opposite in fact, the fewer carbs she had, the more cut she became, the happier she was, the less she would wear and the more she wanted to pose for me. I always looked forward to leg day in particular.

Sarah rewards me for making her another delicious and nutritious breakfast with a big smile and a little gun show before she goes off to the gym and makes those bad boys grow. In another version of this fantasy, I've installed all the workout equipment she could ever want in the basement (and air-con, and a sound system, and, naturally, lots and lots and lots of mirrors) and this is a post-workout flex. AKA foreplay.

But even on her rest days, when we'd take casual walks around the neighbourhood, I was the happiest man in the world. All that barely disguised jealousy on the faces of the guys as we strolled past them did wonders for my self-confidence. She'd look great in anything she threw on, and I always remembered to bring the camera.

Sarah borrows a shirt of mine with hilarious results, then does her best Buster Keaton face for the snap. She spent the rest of the day in this 'outfit'. When she answered the door to the postman, the look on his face was priceless.

Fresh from the tanning bed, Sarah got me to take this so she could analyse how her back was coming on. I often had trouble holding the camera still when faced with such a task, and it shows here. Her body was just so overwhelming up close. She never got cross with me about the blurry images, though. I think she always rather liked that she could have that effect on me.

So instead of getting uptight about it, she just bought me a tripod. Even when, as here, she was wearing nothing more than her favourite thong, the camera was always as solid as a rock - that is once my shaky hands had managed to fix the damn thing to the tripod.

Sarah moisturises before bedtime. I probably should have done the bathroom up a bit, it was hardly fit for a goddess, was it? She never complained, far from it. I just wish I'd maybe given it a lick of paint. In my defence, female muscle slavedom can be a time-consuming business that doesn't leave a lot of free-time for DIY. Or perhaps because Sarah was always doing things like moisturising herself naked in the bathroom with the door open, DIY just never sprang to mind.

In fact, thinking back, Sarah would spend most of her time shirtless, something I always made sure she knew I appreciated. After all, what's the point of all that hard work to build those delicious muscles if you are going to cover them up and hide them away. And furthermore, if you have the legendary sex drive of an FBB, it doesn't hurt to keep your man titilated and ready to do his duty at a moment's notice, does it?

And here is Sarah getting ready for a Saturday night out from her older YouTube channel, SarahDunlapInMotion. OK, she may have lost a bit of muscle by this stage, but let's face it, if any of us went out on a Saturday night and met a woman with Sarah's muscles here, we wouldn't be complaining.

[editor's note: concerned that 6ft1swell has finally lost his already tenuous grip on reality, today's post was followed by an intervention by the FMS team, and Swell has agreed to undergo psychological evaluation. We await the results.]

FBBUK: The Transformation of Linda Gartside

And so to our final post of this epic week (well, it's been bloody epic to put all these posts together, anyway - I do have a life outside this blog, you know!) highlighting just a handful of the finest women in Britain today, with the story of the 2012 NABBA Universe Trained Figure Class 1 Winner, Linda Gartside.



And I believe it's such a good story that there's no reason at all why it shouldn't be made into a movie. My screenwriting handbooks tell me you need a first act that sets up the main character, their inner need and the flaw that prevents them from achieving it. Well, Linda's story certainly has that. See what you think about this for a set-up.

Rochdale, England. The 1980s.

15-year-old Linda Gartside, like the rest of her family, has weight issues. Shy, bullied at school, she stuffs herself with crisps and sweets in secret.

Linda loved Arnold Schwarzenneger in Conan, so when her mother sees one of his books at a jumble sale, she buys it for her daughter. Linda loves it, especially the pictures of Arnold and his mighty muscles.

Linda bugs her mother to let her join a gym. As she slips into the weights room, the sight of so many strong, muscular, Arnold-like men in one place makes her gasp. So when one of them turns and looks at her, all she can do is blush and leave.

Linda and her mother struggle down the street carrying a dumbbell each.

In the garage, Linda attempts a bicep curl. She fails. She removes weight from the dumbbell and tries again. Again she can’t do it. More weight off, just one tiny plate on each end now. She picks it up again, and… success! She removes the weight from the other dumbbell and starts to curl them both, counting one… two… three… The camera pans to Arnold on the cover of the book, smiling… four… five…

Fade out.



In the second act the protagonist attempts to attain their goal, but is prevented from doing so. In the middle of the second act comes the turning point - a major event that changes the way the protagonist approaches their goal. Again, Linda's story has that.

Fast forward twenty years and on the face of it, Linda has overcome the issues that her shy, bullied, binge-eating teen self struggled with. She owns her own driving school, she’s a black belt in taekwondo, and she’s a qualified holistic therapist. She’s the mother of two children and she’s now a regular at the gym. It all seems so different.

But underneath, those issues remain. She’s still scoffing chocolates and crisps in secret. In fact, it’s her guilt about this that drives her to the gym. She still feels like an outsider, in her own words, a dumpy wallflower. And by her own admission, her anxieties over her clandestine eating and her body have meant, despite having had the children, she’s been unable to maintain a relationship.

Then, at the age of 38, Linda makes a decision that by the age of 40, she’s going to stand on stage as a competitor at a bodybuilding show. What made her decide this is unclear, but before I pitch the script in Hollywood, I’m going to have to find out.

She’d just joined a new gym at the time, maybe she met a woman there who was preparing for a contest. Perhaps that woman’s muscled-up beau was the motivation. Perhaps she came across the old book on Arnold or her rusty old dumbbells while clearing out the attic. Whatever the reason, her transformation had begun. But she was not alone. Into her life came Ken ‘Skip’ Hill, a contest prep expert from Colorado of all places (what was he doing in Rochdale?!)

Now in my mind, Ken looks and sounds exactly like Meredith Burgess in Rocky. Sadly, Mr Burgess is no longer with us, so we’ll have to find an equally gnarled character actor to play ‘Skip’. Maybe he’s ended up in Rochdale because he’s washed up, and what Linda offers him is a last chance to redeem himself.

Anyway, over the following two years, Linda Gartside, with Skip’s help, completely transformed her body. You can watch the complete transformation on her website.



So where’s the third act? In the third, and final, act, the hero (or heroine) finally overcomes all obstacles, conquers their flaw, and finally gets what they want. But hasn't Linda done that already? Well, yes and no. Because although our heroine has transformed herself, fate was about to intervene.

Four weeks before her first competition, Linda was, as usual, giving a driving lesson to a client when her car was hit from behind by a 26-tonne truck.

There’s your third act!

Now thankfully, Linda was not seriously injured, and the accident delayed her competitive debut only by four months. For the movie, I think we’ll need a more serious injury, her kids and Skip waiting for news at the hospital, hoping, praying. For dramatic effect, we’ll need doubt about Linda’s ability to ever train again, just so we can have her inspiring recovery take us to the story’s climax.

But in fact Linda took to the stage in September 2010 at the NABBA England and finished 2nd in the Trained Figure Class. Four weeks later, the dumpy wallflower was the NABBA UK Champion.

I can see it now. The kids punching the air and running onto the stage. The music rises to a crescendo. Skip, backstage, the tough guy façade finally cracked as tears of joy stream down his weathered cheeks. And Linda, finally the champion she’d first dreamed of being twenty-five years before…

I think you’ll agree that there wouldn’t be a dry eye in the house.

But that is not the end of the movie, or indeed the real story of Linda Gartside’s transformation. Sure, she had achieved her ambition to stand on the stage. But had she defeated her demons?

She certainly didn’t think so. A year after her first contest she underwent hypnotherapy and regression therapy in an effort to resolve her eating disorder. It was a success, and Linda’s greatest victory of all.

So perhaps the film shouldn’t end with her NABBA UK victory. Perhaps the story should continue with a relapse into binge eating, an ultimatum from Skip - It’s the chocolate or me, kid - before Linda starts the therapy. Then we can have the big finish set at the NABBA Universe last year.



Linda won her class there, and though she lost out on the overall title, we can leave that out of the movie, or just have her defeating Maria Kuzmina in the overall posedown anyway. After all, this is ‘based on a true story’.




But on second thoughts, we could still have a stirring finish by sticking to the truth. As Linda says herself, The best part of competing is knowing full well that I have beaten my family history of obesity.

Me and you, Linda. Your story, my words. Hollywood. What do you say?







A truly amazing story of a truly amazing woman. The best possible way to end our FBBUK week.



Visit Linda's website for more of this remarkable woman, and she also has a youtube channel with contest and training clips, as well as clips of other NABBA competitors.

FBBUK: NABBA Women Do It In Thongs

Today, a selection of some of Female Muscle Slave’s favourite British NABBA contestants, and some NABBA trivia that may or may not surprise or interest you.

NABBA women compete in Toned Figure, Trained Figure (divided into two classes, dependent on height, at bigger shows) and Physique classes. The Physique class (the equivalent to the Bodybuilding class at NPC shows in the US) is, sadly, appearing less and less frequently, and for the last two years has disappeared from NABBA's longest-running international showcase, the NABBA Universe. However, there's still plenty of female muscle talent to admire, and NABBA women are always very tanned and very cut. Oh, and don't forget that all these women have day jobs. And they do it in thongs.

Nicola Bentham (Toned Figure)
2012 Miss Britain, Miss World and Miss Universe


She won every contest she entered last year, but there’s surprisingly little information about the lovely Nicola. We do know that 2012 was only her second year of competing, making her achievement all the more stunning.



Did you know...?
NABBA was formed in 1950, making it the oldest bodybuilding organisation in the world. The first Miss Universe, Elizabeth Lamb of England, was crowned in 1966. In 1986, separate Figure and Physique classes were introduced for women for the first time.

Jody Shuttleworth (Trained Figure)
2012 Miss England, 3rd Miss Universe Trained Class 1



Jody, originally from Bradford in Yorkshire, works with vulnerable children and families, a job so demanding that she initially started training simply to relieve the stress. That was 15 years ago, and she eventually started to compete in 2007. I am a shy person, particularly in front of large groups of people, she says. But this hasn't stopped her winning Trained Figure titles at the 2007 NAC Britain (her first ever contest), 2009 NABBA UK, and 2010 NABBA Britain, in addition to being the reigning Miss England.



Did you know…?
The current Miss Universe is Maria Kuzmina from Russia, the Figure Miss World is Lesley-Ann Armstrong from Northern Ireland, and the Physique Miss World is everybody’s favourite eight-pack goddess, Elena Oana Hreapca from Romania.

Sarah Hallett (Trained Figure)
2012 Miss Wales, 2nd Miss Britain Trained Class 1, 4th Miss World Trained Class 1



Despite being Miss Wales, finishing runner-up at NABBA Britain and her respectable finish at the NABBA Worlds, Sarah is determined to make an even better showing this year. I'm super-motivated [for 2013], she says, so all I can say is look out! I certainly will. And as you watch her routine from the NABBA Wales below, and appreciate her charismatic stage presence, you might like to think about the fact that Sarah is a firefighter.



Did you know…?
Christine Envall was NABBA Miss World three times, in 1997, 1998 and 2000. Giovanna Rosa of Italy won NABBA Miss Universe Figure four times in a row, from 1999 to 2002.

Sally Knights (Toned Figure)
2012 2nd Miss Britain, 3rd Miss Universe


Sally began bodybuilding just two years ago when her ex-boyfriend (who had been a competitive bodybuilder himself), told her she didn't have the bottle to do it. When someone tells me I can’t do something, it makes me even more determined, says the 35-year-old hairdresser who, like Jody Shuttleworth, comes from Bradford. My clients get really into it, watching my body change each time they come for an appointment.



Did you know…?
The global umbrella organisation NABBA International was formed in 1984, after which the World Championships started. It’s headquarters are in Melbourne, Australia.

Nicola Goodwill (Trained Figure)
2012 2nd Miss North-East Britain Trained Class 1, 3rd Miss Britain Trained Class 1


Time to reignite (excuse the pun) those muscle woman-firefighter fantasies, because that's what Nicola Goodwill does for a day job in Selby, Yorkshire (another woman from Yorkshire!). In fact, it's a job she has always wanted to do, first applying at 18, but having to wait until two years ago to make it through the selection process. Now 30, a tattoo on her left arm reads: Firefighters walk where the devil dances.



Did you know…?
Marie-Laure Mahabir was the first NABBA Physique Miss World, in 1986. Other winners include Deborah Compton (1993), Anja Timmer (1999) and Rahel Ruch (2007).

Cheryl Steele (Trained Figure)
2012 Miss Britain Trained Class 2, 3rd Miss World Trained Class 2


We found information on Cheryl hard to come by, but thanks to Muscle Memory we learned that she was NABBA Miss England and Miss UK in 2011. And we also know she is the wife of Dave Steele, himself a successful NABBA competitor in the Masters over 50 class. The couple that trains together...



Did you know…?
Notable Miss Universes include Erika Mes in 1980, Bernie Price from the UK in 1992, Andrea Izard (1994), Patricia Veldmann (1997), and last, but certainly not least, in 2007, Alina Popa.

Find out where your regional NABBA show will be happening in 2013 on the NABBA UK website. For other countries, the standard web address for NABBA organisations seems to be www.nabba.+your country's domain.

Enjoy!

FBBUK Extra: Rosanna Comes Third!

I promised you news of Rosanna Harte's showing at the Arnold Amateur this weekend, and so here it is. The British Champ finished third in the lightweight class behind the more experienced Ana Paula Silva of Brazil, and Branka Njegovec from Croatia, who went on to claim the overall title as well.



To me, there's something very old school about Rosanna's body shape and conditioning, as though you could photoshop her into a contest pic from the late 80s and she wouldn't look out of place next to the likes of Anja Langer or Cathy Palyo. I think it's a very pleasing aesthetic, though how far it'll take Rosanna in international bodybuilding contests these days remains to be seen.



I hope she's pleased with her placing and proud of herself (nothing on her Twitter page since before she left for the USA) because she should be!



Congratulations Rosanna from FMS, and best wishes for the rest of 2013.